Podcast Transcriptions

Pursue What Matters

Episode 13: Life, Leadership, and Fitness with Lynndsey of Fitbliss Fitness

Please excuse any typos, transcripts are generated by an automated service

Dr. Melissa Smith 0:00
Today I’m so excited to have Lynndsey Eldridge owner of Big Mountain Barbell and Fitbliss Fitness here with me to talk shop about life and leadership. You have got to listen up because this lady has so much wisdom to share with us. And I’m just so excited to have her here. Not only does she own to thriving businesses, but she empowers women every day practices. What she preaches is a nationally ranked fitness athlete. Oh, and by the way, she’s a new mother. She’s amazing. And she’s here with us. So let’s jump in.

Dr. Melissa Smith 0:38
Hi, I’m Dr. Melissa Smith. Welcome to the pursue what matters podcast where we focus on what it takes to thrive in love and work. I’m so excited to have Lynndsey Eldridge with me today. Okay, so I want to say just a few things about Lynndsey. I’m going to try and keep it to just a few things. And then I’m going to let her introduce herself. So first of all, I just have so much respect for Lynndsey. So she’s my strength and fitness coach. I was I was like, okay, she’s my strength coach, she’s my fitness coach and nutrition like she is sometimes you’re my therapist.

Dr. Melissa Smith 1:32
And I’ve been working with her for what, like four, four or five years

Lynndsey Eldredge 1:36
Yeah quite some time now.

Dr. Melissa Smith 1:37
Yeah. And so I really gotten to know her well, in that time. And let me just say that, you know, given my specialty as an eating disorder psychologist, so in my life as a, as a clinician, I’m an eating disorder specialist. And so I’m really choosy when it comes to picking a fitness coach. And so I did a lot of research, before choosing Lindsay. And the more I learned about her and talk to other professionals in the field, because I totally stocked her before I hired her. So like I watched YouTube videos, and I read up on her and I talked to other fitness coaches, like I really called around and did a lot of research. So before I ever even talked to her, I was quite certain I would be in good hands because I could see, first of all, that she was very different from others in the fitness industry, which in my book was a really good thing. And having worked in that industry, who you know, tend to peddle a lot of dangerous messages and make promises that are not sustainable. And Lynndsey really is a breath of fresh air. And one of the things I really have loved about Lynndsey is that she loves science and research and has actually taught me a lot about the science of nutrition, and strength training. And of course, this has been personally really beneficial to me. But it’s also really strengthened my clinical practice. And I use the things that she’s taught me every single day in my professional practice. And so that’s a little bit about her as a coach.

Dr. Melissa Smith 3:10
But I also want to tell you about why I invited her to be on the podcast and why I think she has a lot of value to add to our focus of pursuing what matters. So first of all, this lady is killing it when it comes to life and leadership. She gets it so she has clarity when it comes to purpose and mission in her businesses and in her life. And I have such respect for that. So I promise I’m gonna let her introduce herself. But I just want to quickly list some of her credentials. There are a lot of them. So I’m going to go quick that I thought could be particularly relevant for our conversation today. So she’s the owner, with her husband, Zack of Big Mountain Barbell, which is really like the premiere powerlifting gym in Utah. It’s super cool. So if you’re a power lifter in Utah, you gotta check it out.

Dr. Melissa Smith 4:00
Or lifter, or aspiring lifter.

Dr. Melissa Smith 4:02
Yeah, yes. True.

Dr. Melissa Smith 4:04
Want to lift it. Check us out. Yeah,

Dr. Melissa Smith 4:06
it’s awesome. It’s so cool. And she’s also the owner with her best friend Annika Cannon of Fit Bliss Fitness, which is an incredible fitness company dedicated to empowering women. And it’s face to face. It’s online, right? You’ve got national clients. So they really do do it all. So she’s an entrepreneur, obviously, she’s a first generation college student is that right? And continues to provide a lot of support to her family of origin. So she’s really had to pave the way for her path, which I think can be really difficult. And that’s, that’s something that I can relate to in terms of some of those challenges. And I think sometimes it can be difficult to appreciate how challenging that can be and I think it can really help to forge a lot of resilience and a lot of grit as well. She’s a nationally ranked fitness athlete. So of course, she understands sacrifice, the importance of having big goals, being able to grind day after day, delaying gratification, dealing with failure, putting yourself back in the arena again and again. And again, she’s a new mother, and so is navigating even more, I’m really excited to hear how she’s balancing all of this, especially with this huge transition. And of course, we want to hear a little bit about how all of that’s going. But she’s also just so wise, she gets it. So I love doing face to face workouts with her because we’re always talking about life and leadership and business and all that sort of thing. And I want to know how she remains grounded, and what helps her to stay steady with purpose. So those are just a few reasons, I thought it would be really great. So Introduce yourself.

Lynndsey Eldredge 5:54
I’m humbled by your introduction, I feel like what’s left, I think I learned some things about myself there that you’ve been picking up on? No, but yes, so I’m Lindsay and I do do all of those things that Melissa listed off. But ultimately, I feel that the best introduction is just that I believe in empowering women through health and mindset. And of course, that looks different for everyone. You talked about power lifting, lifting this sort of stuff. I definitely think that exercise and nutrition are empowering, because they give us some clarity and just the long term benefits of such but ultimately, I just want to help women see their strength and help them feel their best, which as many different it’s hard to say I do this because I feel like it’s different for every person, every project, every chapter, you know. Yeah, absolutely. I’d say that’s the that’s the that’s my mission. Yeah. Right, like helping women be their best. Yes. And the details of what that looks like really varies depending on the weight on the woman on their goals on their starting point. Even on their life, you may have a big picture goal. And it may be like, well, with where you’re at right now. And everything else you’re going through, these are the things that I think will actually be the most empowering at this time. Yeah. Because for example, if someone was like, well, I want to do a bodybuilding competition, but they’re also in school, raising a family have all of this, it may be better to have a conversation of how can we really help you feel empowered and healthy in this chapter while maybe keeping this as a big picture goal, right? Having those honest conversations and always helping them feel them best. Because if you’re working towards a goal, that’s not a good fit at that time, that’s actually not empowering. Yes. very discouraging.

Dr. Melissa Smith 7:31
Yes. Which those can be kind of hard conversations.

Lynndsey Eldredge 7:34
Definitely. Because people are coming to you, I want to do this. And you’re like, wellllll, I know you can. But let’s talk about the why. Let’s talk about the path. Let’s talk about the reality of your life right now. Yeah, figure out where we really want to go and where we are.

Dr. Melissa Smith 7:48
Okay, so tell me, let’s let’s just start from there. How do you have some of those difficult conversations, especially in the fitness industry, where, you know, people are saying, I want to lose weight, and professionals in the fitness industry are like I can, I can help you lose weight, I can help you do this, even even to the extent of maybe unrealistic expectations, expectations, goals, things that may not be empowering at all. And you come in as a voice of wisdom, right?

Lynndsey Eldredge 8:24
So this is something that I’ve definitely got better at over the years, in my early years as a trainer. And as a coach, I wanted those clients. Yeah, I didn’t have a big client base, yet. I didn’t have as much experience. And I think to some degree, I fell into the trap of not feeling comfortable telling people the truth, and hoping that I could help them get there if we tried really, really hard. Yeah. And over the years with more and more experience, I realized, you know, there is there’s just a reality of how long it takes to do certain things. And I got more and more comfortable. I think as my business became a little more successful, and I wasn’t so desperate. Ultimately, I feel whether it’s trying to take on build your business or trying to reach fitness goal, whatever we have, a lot of times we fall into this desperate mindset. And that’s where the problems occur. Yeah. And so I feel I was kind of in that space in the very beginning. Because I, let’s say was motivated, but also desperate. Yeah, build my client and client base and have a successful business. And over time, I just learned that really being honest and direct, even if it wasn’t what people wanted to hear. Ultimately, I could have a better foundation in those relationships. So yeah, some people were like, I want to lose 20 pounds in three months, for example. Yeah. And I’d have to say that’s not a realistic goal. This is more realistic trajectory of what you can expect. These are the reasons why this is the science behind it. If we were to lose these 20 pounds in three months, this is what may happen to your metabolism, you may lose muscle, you may develop an eating disorder, all of these different things. And I’d say 50% plus of the time people walk away, and they go to another coach who will tell them what they want to hear.

Lynndsey Eldredge 9:57
And initially when I was younger, that was kind of hard for me because it felt like rejection. It was feeling like that I wasn’t a good coach. But then what ended up happening over time is that 50 or less percent, who ended up saying, we had a really honest foundation, and we had a good understanding of where we were going. So those clients wind up being more long term clients, they have more respect for you, because you have that trust of that open relationship. Yeah, so I definitely think in our industry, it is hard because all of the marketing all the messaging really plays to people’s both vulnerabilities and desperation. So their fear Exactly. And there’s a big group of people who are still hoping that there’s some magic thing that’s going to get them where they want to go, even if they really do know better, because they’ve tried and failed before. It really is something that we are uncomfortable, whether it’s with our body or where we’re at, and we’re so desperate to have it now that we keep kind of buying into the crap.

Dr. Melissa Smith 10:52
Yeah, yeah. Absolutely

Lynndsey Eldredge 10:53
I mean, so it’s a special kind of woman or man, I really work more with women, but it’s a special kind of person who has that awareness and that maturity and just that willingness to be like, okay, I recognize that I can recognize and acknowledge that I want to achieve this an X amount of time, but I have enough experience and trust in my coach to realize that it’s gonna take a little while longer and I’m willing to put in the work.

Dr. Melissa Smith 11:17
Yeah, yeah. Well, and this is the thing like, the truth is ultimately empowering. Yeah. Right, even if you don’t want to hear the truth.

Lynndsey Eldredge 11:28
So Well, we’ve had I’ve had people who I do one of these consultations with, I’m very open with and they’re like, well, I’m gonna go with this coach over here, because they said they can do it

Dr. Melissa Smith 11:36
Because they’re telling me what I want to hear

Lynndsey Eldredge 11:37
I’m like, Okay, go ahead, go do it. And oftentimes, they end up coming back later. Yeah. And I hate to say it, but they’re like, some of the things you said were going to happen happened. Like, now I’m having digestion issues, or I’m like, I can’t lose any weight, even though I’m eating really low calories. And there is a lot of science behind the actual changing of the body and the body composition. And if the pendulum swings both ways, so people go to these coaches who have really extreme measures, and then it ends up causing some damage. Yeah. And I try to warn them, they don’t really listen, they go with the extreme promises, and come back and like, okay, now I’m worse off. And I realize now they’ve learned the lesson. Now they’re ready to be that person who’s more self aware and ready to like, go on the longer road that will be more sustainable and actually get them there.

Dr. Melissa Smith 12:25
Exactly. Yeah. Well, and and you, you talk about, you know, developing, developing some of that trust and confidence in your own in your own ability and in in your own skills, right with your business. So tell me, tell me a little bit about your path.

Lynndsey Eldredge 12:43
My path in business, or path overall?

Dr. Melissa Smith 12:46
Yeah, life and business? Like I mean, did you always know you wanted to do this?

Lynndsey Eldredge 12:50
I definitely did not always know.

Dr. Melissa Smith 12:54
Good, yeah I think that’s the exception.

Lynndsey Eldredge 12:57
Yeah, totally, I actually I went to I went to college at Weber State University in Ogden, hey, and I had an I have an undergrad degree, which is a very interesting degree. It’s called a Bachelor of Integrated Studies. So most bachelor degrees, you do 40 credits in your area of emphasis outside of your general studies. And my degree, I did 20 credits in three different areas of emphasis. So rather than doing say, 40 credits in communication, I did 20 credits in communication. I did 20 credits in English, and I did 20 credits in Poli-Sci. And then I also had that I know, and then I have a minor in legal studies. So it sounds like I was really like, motivated and have this crazy degree, honestly, I kept changing my major. And then I’m

Dr. Melissa Smith 13:42
Oh, that sounds familiar.

Lynndsey Eldredge 13:45
And then I got towards the end of my studies, because I kind of I wanted to, I was thinking I wanted to go to law school I, I was the editor in chief of my high school newspaper. And so I ended up in some of the communication classes really into that. Yeah. And I always really loved to write. So I did some English, and I was kind of all over the place. And towards the end of my fifth year, halfway through my fifth year of college, all over my place, I discovered this Bachelor of Integrated Studies degree and I’m like, Oh, I have 20 credits and all of these,

Dr. Melissa Smith 14:12
I need to graduate!

Lynndsey Eldredge 14:13
Exaclty! And I was able to kind of apply them. And at that time, I really was thinking that my next step would be law school. But I feel now looking back, the reason I felt that way was that I didn’t know what I want. And I have a really close relationship with my grandpa, my father’s dad. And at that time, I think that I thought that would make him really proud. Because what else is I mean, be a lawyer. Like, you know, I was 20 something years old. To me, that would be like the epitome of like success. And I didn’t really know what I wanted to do. I was interested in the Constitution. I was interested in civil rights. I was interested in all these things that it kind of just seemed like a natural segway to me.

Lynndsey Eldredge 14:52
But then after being in college for so long, I was going to take a little bit of time off like six months to a year. I was considering getting a job as a paralegal kind of to get my feet wet all of this sort of thing. And, you know, at the time I was dating my husband, Zach, I’m married to now. And we actually broke up at this time, so I was actually fishing for a compliment. Once we were like hanging out one evening, you know, I’m like, I don’t know, if you really want to be with me, expecting him to like, give me all these compliments, I was really insecure. But here we are both newly new college graduates, knowing what I know. Now I know, we were so young, we had no idea what we wanted. And he had a really fair answer. He was like, You’re right. I don’t know what I want. I don’t know if I want to get married. I don’t know if I want to go live in a mud hut in Costa Rica. He literally said that.

Lynndsey Eldredge 15:42
I was totally, but at the time, here I am, this young woman still kind of finding my confidence, and it really hurt my feelings. And I also kind of felt like, well, if I’m going to be in relationship with someone we’ve been dating for a couple years, I want them to know, even if they don’t know anything else, I want them to know, like, I’m their person, or that they want to be in love with me exactly. So kind of, we are on a tangent, but I will circle back. So we ended up breaking up and I was in Utah only because he was here and his family was here, my family was all back in Washington. And at the time, my family, my aunt and uncle who I actually lived with in high school. And they have a business that I ran, ran somewhat when I was in high school, and they were having some issues with their business, it was a coffee shop, they just needed help kind of with some management stuff. So I kind of put some of the other stuff on pause was like, I’m just gonna go for this summer, I got an apartment with my brother started managing the coffee shop, you know, doing whatever. And then as part of this breakup, I kind of was like, I’m gonna do a fitness competition, kind of like he broke up with me, it was like my revenge body thing, right? And I’m not gonna focus on him, I’m not gonna focus on guys. I’m just gonna, like, help my family out. And I’m going to go to the gym, and I’m going to train for this competition.

Lynndsey Eldredge 16:58
And then, right, yeah, and then I hired a coach. And back to this good coach, bad coach thing. I wasn’t educated in the fitness industry and coaching at the time. So I just kind of knew someone at the gym who competed, they referred me to a coach, I hired them. And I started doing a lot of their protocols. And because I am science minded, and especially with my background and my degree, I knew how to research things. And in college, you know, I did a lot more research on the legal side of things, but it’s still really easy to apply that skill to to the other side. So my coach would have me do things, and then I’d go read the research. And I’m like, this doesn’t make any sense. For example, He had me on really low dietary fat, and I was having some negative side effects from it. And so I was googling different things I was doing, I was going into the scholar, scholarly articles and trying to figure out why. And I found that there was a lot of research on dietary fat and women and why we needed more dietary fat. And the negative impact it can have on our hormones on our mood can make your hair start falling out, it can disrupt your menstrual cycle, all these things. So I was bringing this information to him. And

Dr. Melissa Smith 18:03
he was like, you’re reading you’re reading well, just eat your chicken

Lynndsey Eldredge 18:07
he had this attitude, . Yeah, he was like, Do what I say like I was a problem client. Right? Exactly. Because I kept bringing all these things. And then he’s like, I need you to do fasted cardio. And I worked at a I manage that coffee shop, and I had to be to work at five in the morning. So he was wanting me to do fasted cardio first thing in the morning, which would have been I had to wake up at like, 330 in the morning. Would you do that? Yeah, who does that? I, I wasn’t doing that. Or also I was in my early 20s. So a lot of times I was staying up a little later, like it wasn’t really reasonable. And I was kind of like, Well, why am I doing fasted cardio, and he was telling me that that would give me better results. And then I was digging into the research. And I’m like, but I’m not really seeing anything substantial here. So uh, time and time again, I was his problem client. He really didn’t want to work with me at all. And but ultimately, it did get me interested in the science of not just competing and changing composition, but just the whole culture. Because in my studies, I was kind of shocked because I didn’t realize so many things I believed about health and fitness to just be truths. No question. They weren’t true,

Dr. Melissa Smith 19:10
like, totally

Lynndsey Eldredge 19:12
wrong. Exactly. Like don’t eat carbs at night. Like don’t eat carbs at all, like do a lot of cardio, do a lot of high rep work if you want to change like all of these things as I started delving into the literature, more so just from a place of a like trying to be sure I was doing the right thing with my coach. And then it kind of transitioned into more of just a general curiosity for me, because I was like, here I am. I’m working on the school. Like how can I optimize things? Yes. That’s always been kind of a part of my brain, right? Yeah. So I was trying to optimize things. And in the end, I fired my coach I had I did like, have a successful first competition with them, but I just wasn’t feeling that relationship. He felt very much like he was trying to dominate things rather than have a conversation with me and ultimately, I left him but someone I was really close with at the time my cousin stayed with him. And she went on to do a couple more competitions and she was doing things And while she was doing them, I was like, I don’t really feel good about this. This is what I found. But ultimately, I was just some girl who did one competition and her coach had a team of successful clients. So as much as she respected me and we had a friendship, she wasn’t really making any changes. She was just going with the plan. And it was successful for her. She went on, I did a competition, she won the overall which, if you aren’t familiar with bodybuilding, you go to a show, there may be you know, 300 people in your class in your overall division, and you have an overall so she won the overall, still really trusting him even though on the outside I was kind of just like, nervously watching because I didn’t feel like what she was doing was healthy. Yeah. And after her competition, she ended up having a lot of health problems. So she had digestion issues, she was having problems with her. Her hormones, she ended up having to get on some hormone medication, she had to get a colonoscopy at one time, she was having such bad problems with our digestion. Following her competition season, she actually really rapidly gained 40 pounds, which is very common with these really restrictive diet. She

Dr. Melissa Smith 21:02
looks great on stage. Yeah,

Lynndsey Eldredge 21:03
exactly. But then. So then that had a super, that had a major impact on her. Just her competence, because here she had been training for six to 12 months. For these competitions. She was known as the fit girl. Yeah, at the gym, everyone thought she looked amazing. Friends, she thought parties, whatever she was used to being this very, you know, and that’s a hard thing about competitions, which is a whole nother conversation as you start to kind of you get validated by your external appearance, and you get used to people always complimenting it. Yeah, that bought the body image. And that’s a whole, that’s a whole different conversation. But anyways, so she was dealing with physical health problems, psychological health problems, all these problems. And then I was mad. Then I was just mad, because here I cared about her. I tried to warn her, I tried to warn her coach. And I realized he didn’t really care about any of this. He just wanted. In his mind, she placed first overall, he could put that at the time, social media wasn’t such a big thing. But he could put that on his Facebook page, he could tell other clients…

Dr. Melissa Smith 21:05
He was successful!

Lynndsey Eldredge 21:07
Yeah and it was his reputation. And I found in that particular part of the fitness industry that was the big thing that the end all be all was how many competitors could you have when not what happens to them after what happens to them during and that made me interested in coaching myself and kind of trying to apply the research that I was looking into? What I didn’t know at the time is there was this like underground movement where there was a lot of other people and coaches people who were even more. So what I do is I look at the research that scientists are doing. I don’t consider myself an actual scientist, because at this point, I’m not doing the research. Yeah. But there were scientists who were starting to kind of develop this whole movement, this science based fitness movement that was underground, and I just kind of happened to pop out at the right time to start learning from them. And there was, you know, there’s all these places on the internet forums at the time, because it was more than like, you know, it was 10 years ago. Yeah, it was a forum. Yeah. Remember the conversation that we’re having Instagram wasn’t even. Yeah, around yet. But anyways, so my path kind of was on accident. And over time, I was just posting things on like, my Facebook and I had friends who knew that I did a competition. So a lot of women were kind of asking me like, Can you help me with a workout? Can you help me with this? And because I was feeling excited about it, even though it wasn’t my profession, I started kind of helping some of my friends. This passion. Yes. And I was getting really into it. And then the more I was, then Instagram did become a thing. Yeah. And I started being more aware of all the different coaches who are out there online coaches, and still this misinformation that just is rampant on the internet. in magazines, too. I mean, that was the biggest thing. My whole knowledge base on fitness, nutrition and diet came like from magazines, things my mom said when I was growing up, Oprah and

Dr. Melissa Smith 23:54
I’m thinking to like Self magazine, Shape…

Lynndsey Eldredge 23:57
which if you look at any of those standardized diets, and those magazines, they’re always like 1200 calories, they’re always very restricted. There’s so much bad information out there. And anyways, even though I wasn’t planning necessarily on becoming a coach at that time, I became very passionate about just like putting what I was learning out there as I was learning it, and telling my friends and my girlfriends who I was helping out I was like, here do this. And so at this time had been about a year maybe a little bit more since I had graduated college still hadn’t applied to go to law school still hadn’t got a job as a paralegal was kind of a little all over the place. just helping my family live. Yeah, brother. Back in back to the thing with Zack.

Dr. Melissa Smith 24:35
Yeah, I was gonna where’s Zack?

Lynndsey Eldredge 24:37
He actually pretty soon after our breakup started sending me like love letters and trying to get my attention

Dr. Melissa Smith 24:43
Of course he did!

Lynndsey Eldredge 24:44
And I was like, Nope, I don’t you didn’t, you didn’t know my worth at the time. Like, I’m going to find someone who appreciates me

Dr. Melissa Smith 24:51
Listen to this empowered woman!

Lynndsey Eldredge 24:53
And now looking back, I was so young. So I’m so proud. Because I could have easily stayed in Utah because I was heartbroken. Yeah, I Like when he broke up I was heartbroken. I got sent home from work three days in a row for crying at work that when he come over to like get his things in my house I was like Stone Cold like, fine you can leave I don’t need you and he’d leave and I’d start bawling but anyways, he started contacting me and ultimately our breakup was really good for both of us. He ended up going and becoming a wildland firefighter. Right after we broke up. I went and started training for these fitness competitions and

Dr. Melissa Smith 25:28
Channeling your emotional energy

Lynndsey Eldredge 25:29
And anyhow so I was in Washington, he was here and after I think it was actually more like six months after our breakup we met up in Boise one time just to like reconnect, I agreed to meet up with him and I had been kind of trying to date other guys and honestly, I was comparing them all to Zack,

Dr. Melissa Smith 25:44
of course, you were

Lynndsey Eldredge 25:45
I was like, they’d be talking about something in my mind I was like Zack would never talk about this. And I was just always comparing. So I decided to meet up with him. And eventually we got back together, but were dating long distance and then he was in Jackson Hole fighting wildland firefighter or doing wildland firefighting and I ended up moving there with him and working for a summer. So then I was doing cocktail waitressing. And Jackson, so still not on any path. Still just kind of training at the gym. Yeah, researching for fun, and, you know, amazing. And honestly, I made a really good income there because I should say

Dr. Melissa Smith 26:19
It was Jackson

Dr. Melissa Smith 26:20
So he was working really hard. I wasn’t working that hard. I was having a lot of fun. But during that summer, which would have been the summer of 2012, I actually decided to get to officially become a coach and a trainer. So I got my NASM certification, which is just I mean, one thing about the fitness industry is it’s super under regulated. Yeah, there’s no one really paying attention to who has certifications, what certifications you have. There’s no overarching entity that’s making sure that people are legit. So there’s a ton of different certifications, some are better than others, the NASM that I got, I think is one of the most thorough but even then, there’s really no oversight. But anyhow, I got my NASM, I started actually taking on clients officially while I was in Jackson Hole, I had a couple of clients who I was helping in the gym and some I was doing just online like friends from Washington. And it wasn’t still at that time. Like this is my path. It was more so like, I might as well make a little bit of income. So I’m going to become an official, like certified coach and yeah, that sort of thing. And, you know, after Jackson, we moved back to Utah. So I was back to where we were going to college and where Zach and I first started out and I then did find like a powerlifting gym. Yeah, well, actually, I started at Gold’s Gym.

Dr. Melissa Smith 27:38
Okay. Uh huh I think like every trainer in Utah must start there.

Lynndsey Eldredge 27:42
I was like in the training up at corporate. And it was my first day on the floor, and I don’t want to like throw them their business under the bus. But the manager at the gym was very demeaning to me. He was like, you’re gonna do well, because you’re really good looking. And like these different things. And I was actually hired on as they wanted me because I did have a college degree and different things. They wanted me to be like a sales manager and a trainer. And he was a sales manager. So he was training me but we were equals. And he would always he was just he treated me very much like, because I was cute. I would be okay at it. And like that I was beneath him, although we were really hired on at the same role.

Dr. Melissa Smith 28:21
Yeah, sounds like a bro.

Lynndsey Eldredge 28:22
Yes, totally. But that was okay. That was annoying. Yeah, I was like, that’s annoying. But whatever I can, like, prove myself. Yeah, but one time we were on the gym floor. And he was like, teaching me how to like train people. And we were working with a woman who was a little bit she was working on her fitness goal. She wanted to lose some weight. So she was you know, she was working on her goals. But he was talking to her and he had her like, jog down somewhere and come back. And as she was jogging away from us, he was like, She’s so out of shape. And he was like talking, talking crap about this woman who were supposed to be helping empowering. And he didn’t do it to her face. But even that I was just like, this doesn’t feel right to me. Yeah. So I ended up walking out and leaving and I contacted their, their people at the top who are doing like the corporate training and everything. Yeah, I was like, you know what you were teaching corporate I really believe I like I stand behind it. But what’s happening in the gym, I don’t feel is what you’re teaching at corporate and I can’t walk into work that with my head held high like so I’m just gonna like, agree to just walk away. And I was very mindful because you have to sign a non compete with Gold’s Gym. So I didn’t even want to go down that road because I just was like, This isn’t a good fit anyways, and down the road, this could be a legal problem.

Lynndsey Eldredge 29:32
So went to powerlifting gym, and at the time, I was relatively new to training powerlifting or training series and weights, all everything I had done up until that point was very self taught. So I met one of these other coaches who I was coaching clients. They’re just a couple at the time and he was training a lot more and he was a power lifter and he like asked me like, how much can you squat. I was like, like 225 or something, whatever it was at the time and he’s like, really like, for your size. Like that’s really impressive and I got under the bar to show him And did like this like quarter squat, which if you’re not into powerlifting, this may not even mean anything to you,

Dr. Melissa Smith 30:06
It means something to me!

Lynndsey Eldredge 30:08
Like he’s like, that’s not a squat, like, what are you doing and he had me like really do what I was supposed to do, which is just getting like, your hip crease down below your knee, just it’s not like your butt to your ankles, yeah, deeper. But anyways, that opened a whole new, I was humbled for sure. But that opened a whole new area of study for me, because then I started studying more, I always been setting the nutrition side of things. And I kinda was really interested in the diet psychology, and being introduced to this new realm. I was really interested then in like more of the exercise science and the form and then I kind of like delve into that, started working on that. And in the end, I still was kind of, at this point doing all of this more as really a hobby that I was getting paid to do while I figured out my path, right? Yeah, path was on the back burner.

Dr. Melissa Smith 30:54
Isn’t that great? Like, I’ll do this while I figure out my path

Lynndsey Eldredge 30:58
The path was unfolding in front of me.

Dr. Melissa Smith 31:00
Exactly. Right. Yeah, exactly. Right.

Lynndsey Eldredge 31:02
So as I’m working on figuring out my path on the side over here, I started getting more and more clients. And then I like, could no longer train at this gym. Because my clients, I needed more space. So I started training at another gym. And at the time, I was working as an independent contractor, where I was paying 33% of my income. And then I was just having so many clients, I was paying out so much. So my husband and I were like, well, we’re paying this guy like $2500 a month to use this gym space, we could have our own gym for $2500 a month.

Dr. Melissa Smith 31:33
That’s where it begins. This shouldn’t be that hard. Yeah.

Lynndsey Eldredge 31:38
And that’s, I believe on one of the questions you sent over like, so it was something like if you knew then what you know, now it’s like, I never would have been here.

Dr. Melissa Smith 31:45
Yeah, I was gonna say it’s probably better that you didn’t

Lynndsey Eldredge 31:49
Cuz it ended up being way more expensive, way more time, way more challenging. But once you kind of take that leap, and make any type of investment or commitment, you kind of just have to see it through. So anyways, the whole reason we decided to get another gym space was to save money, because we felt we were being taken advantage of the other gym owner. And now we know. And so that was kind of this path that we didn’t even intend because you know, now here and I kind of mentioned this before we started this podcast. But um, my husband didn’t even know what he really wanted to do, either. He had just finished his wildland firefighting, he was kind of working on a couple of other projects. His degree was actually he was a college football player. And his degree is in human performance management with a minor in nutrition and a minor in recreation, which is kind of forest service type stuff. But anyways, he had the degree to do it. He knows how to coach, but it was never something that he was passionate about. It was more an easy degree for him while he was being a student athlete. Yeah. So he’s like, I don’t know what I want. I’ll help you open a gym. I’ll coach with you until I figure it out. So I was lucky to have his support. And we could kind of tag team it together. But things just kind of evolved through there because I had the gym. And I haven’t talked a lot about this. But on the other side of things, I had the online coaching company that I was getting off the ground at the same time. And all of it kind of came to fruition more so just by accident. And by kind of just following the passions following what I was interested in. And then having people I know, being curious about what I was doing, and me wanting to share that information. And then you know, I don’t know. Now we’re here.

Dr. Melissa Smith 33:23
And now you’re here. You’re headed one step at a time. Yeah, I

Lynndsey Eldredge 33:27
mean, in our gym, we have moved to a different facility now. And it is. It’s big. For a local gym. It’s a big gym like,

Dr. Melissa Smith 33:35
Awesome equipment, it’s so well equipped!

Lynndsey Eldredge 33:39
And that’s definitely been something that’s happened over time, right? So our new gym is what’s new, we moved in 2017, but it’s 11,000 square feet. And we do have all top of line equipment. But our first gym was more like 4000 square feet. And when we opened the doors, almost every piece of equipment was used hand me down I like actually remember one of my long longest clients I’ve ever had in Utah. He came in and I apologize for the gym. And I wish I could go back now and talk to myself because I didn’t realize how great of accomplishment it was at the time. But at the time, I was like sorry, we just have this like this treadmill and old bar. Like this is all we have. And he was so sweet. And so like no, it’s great. And he’s so proud of me. But yeah, to look at where we started where we are now is pretty crazy. And there wasn’t a plan when we opened like by 2019 This is the goal it just is kind of like just keeping your head above water every day taking opportunities as they come, yeah and learning lessons along the way because you do mess up a lot. right you know

Dr. Melissa Smith 34:39
Yeah all the time. Absolutely.

Lynndsey Eldredge 34:42
So hopefully you just don’t repeat the same mistakes

Dr. Melissa Smith 34:45
Yeah, over and over. Yeah, hopefully you learn the lessons as you as you keep going.

Lynndsey Eldredge 34:50
So in addition to the gym we always had I always had fitbliss which was more of the online component and that’s where we do our fitness or our like, bodybuilding competitors. And our online clients and all of that. But so they both have kind of been building alongside one another, but they are two separate entities. Yeah. And neither one had a clear long term plan in the beginning. So that’s been something that’s been kind of interesting. is it’s just everyday just kind of like, seeing where we go.

Dr. Melissa Smith 35:19
Yeah. So So tell me, tell me about this. So your your path is so is so fascinating, right? So great. And what may even have started out as you know, a side hustle or just like, okay,a hobby, a hobby. I’m interested in this. Now you’ve got two really great businesses. So with where you’re at now, in both of these businesses, what’s, what’s the path forward? From here? You know, because I think, especially when we think about small business owners, one of the big challenges is, you know, first, like, the first few years is okay, how do we just keep our head above water? Right? But then from there, it’s kind of where do you go from here? What what, where do you want to go from here?

Lynndsey Eldredge 36:15
So I’d say, I still many days, feel like I’m just keeping my head above water,

Dr. Melissa Smith 36:21
it often feels that way doesn’t it?

Lynndsey Eldredge 36:22
But I definitely think that I could be better about like, continuing to like delegate and do different things. So I could feel a little less like that. Yeah. I know that some of our bigger picture goals for both. I know what some of our bigger picture goals are. But I still don’t feel like it’s like our long long term, like our gym, actually, that we have in Midvale. We don’t own the building right now. So one of our biggest goals right now is to buy the building, which actually, my husband is doing a lot of that on the side, because he he sells real estate, and he’s able to kind of help with some of the financials on that side. But we would like to own that building so that business can continue to be more of a long term investment for us. Because, honestly, back to where we were trying to not pay that guy $2500 because we wanted to save money. And we didn’t make any money at all, for the first three to four years that we were in business. Yeah, we were losing money, some months, just getting things up

Dr. Melissa Smith 36:46
Which no one on the outside ever thinks about. They’re like, Oh, they own their own business. They’re killing it.

Lynndsey Eldredge 37:20
They always, in fact, our first couple years with our gym. Before we could open our gym, I was actually training in the gym and waiting tables at night. And my husband was still doing the wildland firefighting. So we’re doing all this these things, because we needed a certain amount of money to just like, make a down payment and to buy our used equipment. Yeah. And at the time, our list was we thought so big. And we thought it was so much money, because I remember I think we saved $30,000, which I’m not saying isn’t like a lot of money. But to us at the time, it was like a million dollars. Because we had nothing we were in our early 20s. And we’re like, how are we going to come up with this? But yeah, so anyways, we just got to the point where we weren’t even making any income at all. And we have gotten to the point and it’s kind of interesting with business for us anyways, we went from like not making anything. And then as things start increasing it, it, it. There’s a multiplier there. You just you’re able to start making some money. Once you make a little money, you’re able to make more money, you have money to spend on investment or upgrading equipment. Yeah, improving your product. Yeah. So that was huge for us. And so continuing just to get where we can buy that building because right now we’re renting so that every month we’re throwing away money to rent, which would be more expensive than if we were paying on a loan. Yep. And to at which point would the goal would be just to continue improving whatever is inside of the gym. So we do a lot of powerlifting meets, although I definitely feel our gym sometimes has a reputation of being a really like hardcore gym for only like, people who are super serious. Yeah, after the gold bars really always has been to be Yeah, maybe a world record power lifter would train at our gym, but maybe his grandma would too. And I want people to feel really confident. Yeah, you know, yeah. So I know a lot of gyms, I feel like people kind of have this like macho ism. And they’re very, like, you know, just not super inviting. Yeah, very intense. And so people who are new to it, or who are feeling a little insecure, it’s not a super comfortable environment. So we want to continue building that. We do have power lifters but we have everyday people. Yeah, we have people of all goals. So I think continuing to have the best equipment, but also to have a really positive community and just like feeling when people walk in the door is kind of Big Mountain Barbell and then you know, eventually paying off that building. And then you know, we’re both self employed. So kind of just like a retirement. That would be nice, wouldn’t it just to eventually be getting some income every month and own the building and that sort of thing. So I definitely feel like that side of my businesses is a little bit more. It takes care of itself a little bit more. We have some managers who are in there. You know, I don’t have a lot to do with the data. anymore. Yeah, I do some meetings a couple times a month, I’m there in the gym. But a lot of the mundane tasks, we call our gym, a free range gym. Because kind of like it’s a 24 hour hour access gym, and people just kind of come in and do their thing. So I’d like to continue to see it get better. And for us to be in a smarter financial situation not running with building. Yeah, but for fitbliss. That’s one where we have a lot more day to day work. I mean, I’m thinking about it all the time.

Dr. Melissa Smith 38:13
Your other baby.

Lynndsey Eldredge 38:55
Yes. And that’s one that is a lot more, we have a lot more of these more intimate relationships. And my clients in that side of the business, I’m very close with them work very closely with the coaches. And that’s something that definitely is more of like the passion project for sure. The gym became a place where I could train my clients and where we could invite other people to train and something that was like, why would a good train gym to train that like, it was a business thing? Yeah, right. Yeah, yeah, where the fitness is more of a passion project. But with that, I feel over the years have also become really aware of like, how many clients can I personally work with, and maintain a certain level of product, mental health for myself, and support for them? And over the years, I’ve really pinpointed what that number is for me. Yeah. And I brought in other coaches, we have a team of coaches. Now I’m also aware of that number that I feel is very realistic, which to me, somewhere between 20 to 25. clients. Yeah, I feel is realistic. And back to these other coaches, some of them carry hundreds of clients. Wow. And that’s where they’re just sending out the same workout. Very, yeah, formulaic Yeah, really personalized. They kind of doctor it up and copy paste things in a nice way to make it seem a little more personalized. But so what we’ve really been working on at Fitbliss is trying to take a lot of our philosophy and a lot of our programming and kind of finding a way to package it in a way that is a little bit more of like something that they could just buy into knowing that it’s not necessarily this like personalized experience. But for like a lower rate.

Dr. Melissa Smith 39:01
Yeah. So instead, I got lots of different options. Yeah,

Lynndsey Eldredge 42:09
so trying to kind of a kind of create a little more passive income knowing I can’t really take on more than 20 to 25 clients, but also reaching more people who maybe don’t have it in their budget to spend 150 to $250 a month on their own personal fitness coach. Yeah, because really, the only people who can do that are people of a certain income, a certain background. And there’s people all walks of life, who really could use some support and education. So that’s something we’ve been working on a lot this last year is putting together these this other program, this other side of things where we can reach more women, but still have it be a positive and educational experience for them. Because we also didn’t want to just do something that was for passive income to make money for us, that didn’t really help other people. You’re trying to take the things we’re known for, which is really connecting, educating and empowering in somehow putting it in some sort of program where we could do that, with less of this interaction. Yeah, and while still having the community so kind of a lot. But that’s really what I’m focused on right now is continuing to take care of our people we’re working with, but then also having a positive impact on a broader audience who maybe is still getting who are still getting their information from a magazine. Yeah, or from a fitness influencer on Instagram, who’s not putting out good information, and all of these different areas that are trying to, for people who are looking for for the information, because they’re out there and they don’t know where to look, we want to become more of a resource for them.

Dr. Melissa Smith 43:37
Absolutely. So tell me what, what are the biggest challenges for you in your leadership? Right? Like when you think about, you know, when the days when you feel like you’re just surviving?

Lynndsey Eldredge 43:52
I mean, I know that was what I was gonna say, as I was like, it’s so interesting, because I know I’m a leader. Yes, I lead people, often, but I still don’t necessarily like think I’m a leader. backwards.

Dr. Melissa Smith 44:05
I know you’re there. But I’m not a leader. You’re totally a leader. Yeah, so

Lynndsey Eldredge 44:08
I’m not sure I feel. I’m not sure how to answer that question. I feel one of the biggest challenges used to be for me as a leader is I would find people that I saw a lot of potential in, and then I would want to kind of help bring it out of them. And in the end, with all the different things I have on my plate and the different projects the time thing, I realized it wasn’t really a good plan for my business or for my path right now. Maybe down the road, I hope down the road. I can do more of that kind of mentorship. But over the years, I’ve really learned it’s really important for me to find other people that kind of naturally take on some of these leadership qualities, self starters, people who kind of have those things that I would be looking for, but also kind of just get it. Yeah. So I’ve spent less time over the last few years trying to pull it out of people and rather just have it find these people who they’re just exuding what I’m looking for, and kind of putting them in a position where we can have these conversations. And I may be kind of leading a meeting, but where they’re all still bringing really great things to the table. And we can work as a team as leaders. Yeah. Versus me like trying, I used to take more of a role of wanting to be a leader, and really help bring out all of these great things from other people, which I do really believe in. But as a startup company, I definitely have veered more over to looking for these people who already have it. I’m not pulling anything out of them. They’re giving it to me. Yeah. And I’m like, now what can I do with you? Where can I put you, but best sense for our organization? And yeah, you. And that’s been really helpful for us, I guess, is more so using my leadership to kind of manage other leaders, so it can kind of trickle down to our clientele, yeah, to our business. And that’s been probably the biggest lesson I’ve learned. And the challenge was in the beginning to be like, Well, why don’t they? I just wanted people to naturally do what I would do be more of a self starter go research this on their own. Yeah.

Dr. Melissa Smith 46:06
Do things the way you would do it

Lynndsey Eldredge 46:07
Yeah. And I kept seeing these people who I saw potential and, you know, kind of part of my personality. When I was younger, too. I was kind of like this fixer person where I wanted to fix people, help people assist people, which I definitely still like to have that be part of my identity. But I think there’s kind of a time and place for it. And I think for me right now on my business and my leadership and my business, it’s more so finding the good people, and helping them kind of excel at something they’re already doing really great at. Yeah, if that makes sense.

Dr. Melissa Smith 46:36
Yeah, absolutely. So, so right, with Fitbliss, Fitness. It’s really your passion project. Right. And so you find you find leaders who have this energy, how do you? How do you convey the passion and the purpose? And how do you make sure that that’s conveyed? With those who lead? You know, like, how do you? How do you keep the doctrine pure? How do you?

Lynndsey Eldredge 47:09
I think that that’s a really great question. Because conveyed, do you mean, how do I convey it to them? Or how do we, as a team, convey it to our audience?

Dr. Melissa Smith 47:16
Yeah, like, you know, so as you think about your coaches, how do you make sure that that, you know, the fit bliss philosophy is really…

Lynndsey Eldredge 47:28
So I think one thing that’s super interesting for us is almost all of my coaches used to be my clients. That helped. So for like, Anneke, who’s my business partner, she bought in a couple of years, and we have became part become partners. And Anneke, and Sam are kind of my right and left hand gals kind of introducing, yeah, office staff. And both of them were really early clients of mine, who the program changed their life. And of course, the program has evolved over the years, I worked with Anneke, I think, in 2012, and 2013. So but for them, it had such a major impact, and they’re both had such a major impact on their life. And they’re both kind of like me, they both have, they’re both very well educated, but in different areas. Yeah. Sam has a master’s degree in education, leadership. She was a teacher prior to working for me. She really is a natural teacher. She’s very organized, very motivated, and also very empathetic. Yeah, she understands. She can kind of understand people and is just very compassionate. But also, she’s driven. Like when she actually was in her master’s program, she was teaching, she was in a master’s program, she was doing a competition prep, like, so she’s empathetic, but she also was like, but you got to do this, you know, Anneke’s background is a little bit different. Anneke worked in the medical field, and she was kind of on the treatment side of things. And she was feeling uninspired, because she didn’t really want to treat people she wanted to kind of help. She wanted to be more on the preventative side. And anyways, they both the philosophy changed their life and ultimately kind of changed their trajectory, because they found their that bliss, you know, and then they wanted to share it with other people. So outside of them being previous clients, I think the next thing is us just being really consistent with our messaging and our philosophy. We’ve evolved over time, but that thing that changed their life, it’s still the same thing. We’re offering that clarity, that clarity is hard, and this industry in this day and age, with social media, and all of these other influencers and all this stuff, to stay consistent, because it’s not always what sells it’s not always the honest message that sells. But I think for them, because this thing that we’re selling, quote, unquote, changed their life. They can still speak from a really honest and true place about it and share it with other people and not feel like they’re being manipulative, or feeling like they’re faking it. Like I feel like when they’re, again, I want to use quotes here but like, quote unquote, selling it, they’re speaking from their Heart. And they’re my two probably greatest leaders on my team. So between the three of us, the other people were kind of managing. Yeah. Which almost all are past clients as well, honestly. It’s just really authentic for us and organic, that it’s what we believe in. It’s what we do. It’s what we’ve always done. And while we’re always getting better, like we know it works, because yeah, changed our lives.

Dr. Melissa Smith 50:24
Yeah. So yeah, I feel it builds a really strong culture.

Lynndsey Eldredge 50:28
Yeah, definitely. Right, because it’s not me. And we actually have brought people in who have somewhat different philosophies in the past. And ultimately, it didn’t end up working out. Because we know so we’re so sure of like our messaging and what it is that like, like, for example, not like we had a coach at one time, who was getting really into like, the keto stuff. And she was kind of like, that became one of her platforms, she started doing this other diet where she was eating like raw hamburger, just like an experimental thing for her. But for example, at that time, we were trying to be like, well, we want to be more open minded. And right now keto is really trending people are really and you know, so maybe it’d be good for our brand, if we have this like, funnel of like keto for those people. So if they come to us for like, yes, we can do, you can have someone who tried it for some time, but ultimately, it just didn’t work. Because we’re like this, a big tenet of our brand is this flexibility and how, as long as you’re giving your body the things science tells us it needs from micronutrients, protein fiber, that you really could use a variety of any foods to make that happen. keto becomes very restrictive. And a lot of times people who the reason it is trending is people are looking at it as being some sort of like magical tool. So anyhow, there was a period of time where we were kind of falling into that desperate mindset. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, keto was trending. Some of our clients were wanting to try keto. So we kind of gave this person who I really love and respect as a person, but a little bit more of a platform. And there became a time where we had to have a hard conversation that was like, Look, we want to keep you keep you here, but like, your messaging is no longer on brand. And I do not want to be the type of like leader who’s telling you, you can say this, you can’t say this. So either as your friend, I want to encourage you to go off on your own and do your own thing. Or like to consider maybe like, these are the things that we believe in, and we need to keep our messaging here. Yeah. So there have been times where we’ve strayed a little bit, but we learned pretty quickly that it just didn’t quite feel right. And it was confusing for our people.

Dr. Melissa Smith 52:33
Yeah, it’s, yeah, ultimately, it’s really confusing. And you have to have integrity to your culture. So I was

Lynndsey Eldredge 52:38
trying to be open minded and not be a control freak. Yeah. And then in the end, I was like, well, there’s something to be said for just staying really consistent with what we’ve always done. Yeah, of course, like when we learn new things, even something as basic as like protein recommendations. Yeah, there was a research study done, I think it was in like 2014, where they found like that one time, one gram of protein, for every pound of lean body mass would be the right recommendation. And then there was some further research that came out a few years later, for people who were like dieting, like bodybuilders were really 1.2 grams would be more effective because they’re at risk for muscle loss. So for years, we were telling people this, this one gram, and we realize like, well, now the research has changed. So we need to change. But at the end of the day, that’s still in line with being research based. Yes. A small change. It’s not like now we’re keto. Yeah, you know.

Lynndsey Eldredge 53:30
So knowing when to change, but also knowing when not to change has been super important. Yeah. For us in terms of our branding and our message.

Dr. Melissa Smith 53:38
Yeah. Yeah. Right, like integrating new information that’s still consistent with

Lynndsey Eldredge 53:44
anytime we’re open to being like, you know, we were wrong about this. But it’s never the entire philosophy. Yeah, it might be bits, bits and pieces of it are things we add or different things like that.

Dr. Melissa Smith 53:56
Very cool. Okay, one last question for you. How do you balance Life and Leadership and motherhood because you’re a new mom.

Lynndsey Eldredge 54:04
I mean, I know that I’m experienced enough yet to give the best information or the best, you know, tips. But for me, even before I had my baby, her name is Lucy. She’s three months old. And even before I had her while I was pregnant, I was kind of starting to try to make this transition because being I’m 31 years old. So I did have my first child a little bit later than a lot of people. But I have my sister in law, who’s a little younger than me has two sons. My business partner Anneke has a son. And my one of my brand managers Sam was talking about earlier has a son. So I’ve been able to watch other mothers who I’m really close with and kind of see their challenges, their struggles. So I’ve been able to kind of be like,

Dr. Melissa Smith 54:50
yeah, see what’s working for them, Lindsay’s very observant. Yeah, yeah.

Lynndsey Eldredge 54:54
I’ve been able to kind of see what’s working for them, what’s not working for them. So outside of just like business in my home while I was pregnant, and before I got pregnant, I had a lot of really honest conversations about what that relationship would look like for us, and how we could both manage that those roles together. Because I could tell just by watching everyone who everyone is doing their own thing everyone did different. It wasn’t any one example that I was like, I want to do this or not do this, I was just kind of take it like I realized for us, because we are self employed, and my husband and I are very close, we kind of have this like divide and conquer mindset. And we always have, we have different skills, we have different personalities. So it’s always kind of been dividing things up and playing to our strengths. And I realized that with parenting to some degree, it’d be kind of like that, but also that, for me, I really needed him to be a really active participant in the parenting and not just like, in an emotional sense, but in a literal time sense. So I knew that I needed us to be able to like for him to take care of the child, the child, Lucy sometimes

Dr. Melissa Smith 56:03
was theoretical at the time…

Lynndsey Eldredge 56:06
I wanted us to be on the same page of like, what my expectations were, because I knew that if I didn’t communicate them, he wouldn’t know. So he wouldn’t be able to help me with that. And if I didn’t, I also needed to know that he was okay with that. So we could know for our relationship having children was going to be a good fit. So I think for us communicating our boundaries, our expectations, and kind of coming up with a loose game plan that of course has evolved,

Dr. Melissa Smith 56:32
which can I just say, I mean, most couples don’t have these conversations.

Lynndsey Eldredge 56:39
Yeah. Which I think is a challenge.

Dr. Melissa Smith 56:40
Yeah. And I mean, it’s, it’s like such a basic thing that most couples don’t have, but it’s a game changer. Really. It’s essential, and you kind of need to keep having these congresses. Exactly.

Lynndsey Eldredge 56:53
And that’s something that’s been evolving, and even we just met with we delivered with a midwife, and she actually gave us we also got a family therapy card. Yeah, like sometimes these conversations are getting harder when we’re stressed out. So we were open also, we haven’t gone yet, but potentially doing some family counseling to help us manage these conversations. I think sometimes it’s hard to have level headed communication, we have a screaming baby in your hand,

Dr. Melissa Smith 57:16
you know, and you got hormones, and like you guys run a business together.

Lynndsey Eldredge 57:21
Yeah. But so I’d say first of all, in my relationship with my husband is communicating our expectations and boundaries. And even for me at the time, I was like, Well, I do know that I still am going to want to like go to the gym and work out, I still want to run my business, like I still have this, I know you want to do the same. And it’s just kind of agreeing. Like no matter what happens, it’s important for our, our health and our marriage, that we still have our own personal identities and personal time, and how can we make that work? And so that was key. But then secondly, I think, not just with balancing motherhood, but balancing all things. Something that’s been huge for me over the past few years, is also clearly defining boundaries and expectations for our clients or people we’re working with. Haha, I love it. So yeah, like years ago, you take on a project or I don’t know, if you’ve been this way, sometimes they still fall into this trap. And you know that the person you’re promising this to has a certain deadline they’d really like to meet. And maybe you’re like thinking about it. And like that might be possible if I work until 2am on Friday night, if I don’t do anything over the weekend, and like if I hadn’t completely uninterrupted and like, I feel like when I was a younger entrepreneur, I would take these deadlines on and kind of just think like, well, I’m an entrepreneur.

Dr. Melissa Smith 58:34
Yeah, like I can do it. I can do I have to do it.

Lynndsey Eldredge 58:37
Or I might lose this potential opportunity, or this potential client.

Dr. Melissa Smith 58:40
A little bit of this scarcity mindset.

Lynndsey Eldredge 58:42
And over the years, I feel like it’s been so key to kind of be like, I understand you want it by this date. But for me to get it done at the level of what you like, expect quality wise or whatever. It’s going to take a week longer. Even if I know in my mind, that still buys me a weekend, yet it means I only have to work until 6pm. Because you just learn over time, I definitely think it’s a time and experience thing that you can’t actually do that for very long. Yeah. And your relationships, your health, your business, something’s going to start to suffer. Yeah, so I’ve really learned just being like, it’s going to take this much time or, you know, you’re a client of mine, there’s clear expectations, like my clients check in with me every week, they have a deadline of when they have to send their check ins, and then I have 36 hours to get back to them. And it’s really because my days are so up and down and crazy that I pretty much schedule things and my check ins kind of fill in the gaps in between. But it used to be when I very first started that people checked in. It’s like you’ll get feedback within two hours. You know how stressful that was? I also did have deadlines. So people were sending me like check ins at all different times and I was trying to keep up and it gave me such anxiety. Yes. So over the years I definitely think being realistic with ourselves and people we’re working with on expectations and boundaries and not feeling bad about it. Yeah, because they even feel onika is amazing, but she gives everything to people. And she’s one on the other side of things. I’ve gotten so good at being direct, where I’m like more like, Nope, I can’t do that that’s not a realistic deadline, I can get this done in two weeks. And I don’t even like hardly bat an eye over it anymore. She’s still working on not feeling guilty, because she’s like, well, I could, I could have it done by this time.

Dr. Melissa Smith 1:00:21
I could be superwoman if I need to…

Lynndsey Eldredge 1:00:24
So I think that we’re all kind of on our own path on figuring out what that looks like. Because we do want to take care of our people. We want to take care of our business, and we do care. But kind of keeping in mind the longevity of these goals, these businesses, these plans and communication, I think is just

Dr. Melissa Smith 1:00:42
the key. Yeah, it’s the key. And sometimes it’s those conversations with ourselves to be able to say, What do I need? What do I need in place to do my best work? I need a weekend, I need to be done by 6pm. You know, and, and getting to the point where you don’t feel guilty about that. You don’t apologize for that. And really owning that. I mean, I know we had a conversation about, like client rates and like not apologizing for that and being able to say, this allows me to do my best work and to really show up in Excel. And that that that’s can be really empowering for you. But it’s also it’s great for your client. Totally.

Lynndsey Eldredge 1:01:24
I totally agree. So, yeah, just honesty, it all is the same it all circles back right. That started this conversation. Yeah. Like how do you compete and it’s just being honest. Having that good foundation in the relationship having mutual respect? Yeah. And kind of bringing that to the table, whatever you’re doing.

Dr. Melissa Smith 1:01:43
Yes. Key. Yeah. So great to, to hear from you and to learn from you. So thank you so much for having me. I know thanks so much for all that you do. Okay, so little Lucy’s probably wondering where it is. So we’re so glad to have Lynndsey and for her taking some time to be with us today. So it’s so great to hear more about her journey and experiences. So make sure you head to my website to check out the show notes with all the great resources for this episode at www.drmelissasmith.com/episode-13 again at www.drmelissasmith.com/episode-13. And the other thing that I wanted to let you know, Lynndsey has a really great following on social media. So one thing when you were telling you when you were talking about negotiating with your husband and talking about you know, both of you being really active parents, it just reminded me of one of your posts, I think it was just maybe just a few weeks after Lucy was born. And I was just like, Man, this this lady practices what she preaches, because I think it was a post of like Zach with Lucy at the zoo. And then Lindsay was like, overseeing a powerlifting meet and I was just like, oh, that just makes my heart happy. And like Zach had Lucy, like, in a carrier at the zoo.

Lynndsey Eldredge 1:03:12
And I didn’t tell him what I need. But I gotta give him props for like, meeting me and and following. Yeah, he’s been. Yeah, that’s been really, really beautiful. Yeah, kind of be a part of and have that. Yeah. strong partner who gets it? Yeah, it’s

Dr. Melissa Smith 1:03:27
awesome. I feel the same way about Micah. So it’s a pretty cool. It’s a pretty cool thing. So but i think i think to your point, like you got to be willing to have those conversations and ask for what you need and to revisit them.

Lynndsey Eldredge 1:03:40
Yeah. Because there were times after she was born, that I could feel that I was starting to feel better. Where I know, like, I’m doing a lot more which I’m breastfeeding. So. But there were moments where I was starting to feel like, like I was taking on more of a workload than I felt that we had talked about. Yeah. And I was feeling better. And it was one of those moments where I’d been with her all day, and she was crying and everything we were tired as Yeah, so he did have come home and our first initial conversation wasn’t as smooth. But then the next day, we’re able to kind of like regroup and talk about it and both be heard and both kind of like, more so we just needed to come up with a strategy. Yeah, at the time, like we hadn’t communicated about it. He was thinking everything was fine. I was thinking he was clueless, you know, and it’s just, you know, without telling someone exactly what you need. How are they supposed to know?

Dr. Melissa Smith 1:04:30
Amen. Exactly. Right. So you’ve you’ve got to check out Lynndsey on social media because her posts are always so refreshing and genuine. You really got to check her out. So if you want a breath of fresh air on social media, and who doesn’t we all we all need that she’s really got a fresh take not only on the fitness industry, balancing life navigating motherhood, it’s really great. So check out the show notes on the website and I will include the link Links to all of Lindsay’s businesses. So we’ll include the links to for that bliss fitness, you got to check that out. It’s awesome, of course, big mountain barbell. And then of course, we’ll include Lindsay’s Instagram account. So, and I don’t know, Lindsay, is there anything else you want to share about your businesses or social media or anything like that?

Lynndsey Eldredge 1:05:22
There’s not necessarily anything I want to share about my businesses, I was actually just kind of already like replaying everything we’ve talked about, right? Like, did we did we say what we need to say. And I feel like we did talk a lot about my path and my like how I got here. But I really hope if any of you are out there, and you are in a place where you are trying to find the truth in the fitness industry, or trying to find just that balance, or if you’re feeling like whatever you’re trying to work on in your health, and fitness is something that’s making you feel bad about yourself, or feel discouraged. It just might not be the right path or the right plan that you’re on now. And if you need a little bit of guidance, kind of getting you in a place that you can be productive and feel proud of yourself along the way. We really would love to help. I don’t feel like we really like touched on that so much. But I definitely think people are just using the wrong plan. Yeah, genuinely feeling like a failure. Yeah. So if you’re feeling like a failure, maybe it’s not the right plan. And just acknowledge that you can appreciate your body because it’s amazing. Yeah. while also trying to take steps forward with it.

Dr. Melissa Smith 1:06:26
Yeah, yeah. It’s not you it’s probably the plan.

Lynndsey Eldredge 1:06:29
Yeah. And or the culture or the way you’re thinking and I’m not here to say you never can have goals, because I think goals are great. Yeah. You also can be respectful to yourself. Yeah. As part of the process. So yeah, I think you’re struggling. You know, there are other ways out there.

Dr. Melissa Smith 1:06:45
Absolutely. And that can be a really empowering process. Yes, exactly. Yeah, yeah. Amen. I love that. So definitely check out the show notes. We’ll have all the great resources. And again, that’s www.drmelissasmith.com/episode-13. And I’m Dr. Melissa Smith. Remember love and work, work and love. That’s all there is. Until next time, take good care.

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