Did that just make you squirm a little? If it did, today’s episode is definitely for you. Giving and receiving feedback is hard! It is DEFINITELY one of the most challenging aspects of leadership, but it’s also so important.
The ironic part about feedback is we’ve been receiving feedback our entire lives. We received it from our parents as children, we’ve received lots of feedback in the school system in the form of grades (or the dreaded red marks on our papers), and of course most of us have received feedback in work settings. So why do we have such a hard time?
I talk about this further in today’s episode, but the short answer is this: many times those giving feedback fall on one extreme of the continuum or the other. Either they are conflict avoidant, meaning they are not willing to give direct feedback so it’s vague and unhelpful, or they lean too far on the other end of the continuum towards aggressiveness. The aggressive feedback is where the squirming at the word “feedback” comes from. Feedback given from that end of the spectrum usually disregards the feelings of the individual receiving feedback, and is usually very harsh. Although it may be great feedback, it’s given so aggressively, it’s hard to act on.
Of course, there has to be another way! Somewhere on the continuum where the feedback is helpful, and kind! We need feedback in order to grow and improve ourselves (those red marks on my paper definitely improved my grammar), but how do we give productive feedback without crushing souls?
In today’s podcast, I take a deep dive into the science of why giving and receiving feedback is hard. Like why the brain developmentally shies away from criticism and how that affects us. And then of course how to use this information to give productive feedback to help others improve on their journey.
This is an important topic that you won’t want to miss!
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Links Mentioned in this episode:
- Dare To Lead by Brené Brown
- Good Feedback is Targeted, Specific, Timely Article
- Using Neuroscience to Make Feedback Work & Feel Better Article